Home > Stories > The best ‘Dear NeoSanta’ letter

The best ‘Dear NeoSanta’ letter

Dear NeoSanta,

Aren’t you cold up there in the North Pole? Take my coat, take my gloves, take my fresh-brewed hot chocolate and gourmet cookies… all I want is an apple-themed present. Or a million bajillion presents. Okay, Santa, so I haven’t been a perfect little girl this year. But let’s put our differences aside for a second and focus on reality. You are a pleasantly plump, genial young man. Even through all your centuries of present-delivering, you radiate youth and happiness. Oh, and may I compliment you on your fashion choices. It always amazes me how a man, even a stunning man like you, could stay warm and look good dressed head to toe in a color like, well, red. You know how to pull off a big nose-after-sneezing-fit, frozen-foot color… and by the way it really brings out your eyes. On the topic of eyes, I brought you a box of chocolate. It, er, improves.. eyesight or something. Yeah. So, can’t a splendiforic man like you see the good in a cherubic child like me?  For christmas I want some apple themed items, now just eat my chocolates, okay? Try them! And as I change this prose to ditty, don’t you think my letter is witty?

Sincerely Staring With Puppy-Dog Eyes (and adding a cherry on top),
michelle42298

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Categories: Stories
  1. Bluerang1
    May 17, 2011 at 10:06 am

    AHAHAHAAH!!!!!!!!!!!! Great job Michelle! How can Santa say no to this? xD

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